Please don't troll, not this time:

My mom passed away this year in January from brain cancer. She was the closest friend that I've ever had, and was really the only other person I talked to that would give me serious advice. I've been staying lowkey since that happened and haven't been talking to anyone else because my father and my sister live far away from me now. My mom used to live about 10 minutes away.

Basically, I've been waking up at like 4-5AM about 3-4 times a week after having dreams about taking care of my mom (when she got really bad, I was staying with her and helping her eat and move around). Whenever I wake up like this I can't stop thinking about her and its killing my days. It's hard to socialize and get things done because I just keep thinking about the fact that shes gone. I dont know how to exactly explain how I'm feeling, and I don't know if I could classify my dreams as nightmares, but it really hurts sometimes and last the whole day.

I don't want the rest of my life to be like this, and I want her to know I'm good, I just need advice on how to move through this.

I don't know if I can be of any help as I've experienced grief only once in my life and I was very young but I think time is the most important factor in the recovery process... It's hard but it will get better with time hopefully, I wish you the best and you were very brave and kind for taking care of her when she needed it,keep your head up❤️🙏

Smoking weed before sleeping usually makes ppl not remember any of their dreams

Not the answer u want i know, just an idea

i’ll tell you like someone told me when i experienced a very similar loss to yours

“you never forget, you just learn to live with it easier”

it doesn’t sound good, but let me explain

you never forget the person or what happened, but eventually you just learn to deal. as time goes on, it gets easier and easier to enjoy yourself and your days. some days you’ll remember and feel bad, but only for a second. you’ll start to feel lighter and that the weight is lifting.

eventually it’s just more so a part of you, in a way that, you remember, but it doesn’t consume you.

it takes time though. i’m just over two years out, and i’d say i’m pretty ok. the first 6 months was pretty hard though. just stay strong and persevere. time heals all, or at least makes it easier to deal with

sorry for your loss op. it does get easier. hang in there

first step is understanding that all things pass. including your grief

not to s*** on another user but please don’t smoke with the intent of not dreaming. They will come back 10x harder because you’re trying to suppress it.

it’s important you take care of yourself.

I don’t know if I can help, but we love you and we know you will heal

Head up brother

Hey man, I went through something similar after a family member passed. I think it's best not to fight it. January is still not that long ago, man. You shouldn't be hard on yourself, grieving is going to take time and it's a healthy process to go through. I tried to fight my emotions and I tried to "get back to normal" when I went through it but you can't force it. You just end up becoming more numb to life. I know it sounds cliche but it really is a process and it should find conclusion in a natural way. Hope you feel better soon and I'm sorry for your loss.

What do you feel during the dreams? What emotion?

I’m with her somewhere, whether that be at the house or a restaurant or something, and I feel like I’m good, but then there’s always a point where she or I have to go and I just wake up. It’s not that my dreams are bad, it’s just that I can’t help but hold on to that departure for the whole day, because whenever I wake up, I’m back in a place with no familiarity.

Sounds straight forward

You don’t quite know how to deal with this loss

I think you need to dedicate time to think about this

You mention in your first post that you “can’t stop thinking about her”

That’s the thing. You SHOULD be thinking about her. You just lost your mother

You’re going to be thinking about this for a long time. Accept that, and think about her. Let yourself mourn. That’s how you move through this

And you mention not talking to many people right now. Maybe you should talk to others about this? At the very least you should talk to yourself about it. I would recommend journaling to yourself. Talking to yourself. Also, maybe write to your mom and tell her how you feel