im in school studying international management right now. im doing pretty good, could make good money when i graduate.
but this isnt really what i want.
i see all these people i admire, and they popped off way younger than me. i dont feel old, but i feel too old to be in the position im in right now.
i finished a big part of part one of my trilogy ive been writing for a while, got amazing feedback, but tbh i realized i hate writing, even though im a really creative person.
more than anything, i want to work with people, talk my ideas through with them in a team, and direct them. in that sense, i guess my major is fitting, but i wanna open up my own business, not be in corporate, figuring how to make rich folks more money.
i love the video game- movie- and music industry. i want to work in a way that allows me to act on my creative impulses. i dont mean necessarily writing or painting, even corporate decisions that require out of the box thinking that let me act freely would be dope. money isnt the main factor as long as i can live. what should i do?

Yea

etf is o p p o ß ?- ' '- x D

follow your dreams bro

why have u decided you hate writing as of recent?

i love mapping out the stories, scenes, character arcs, stuff, themes, motifs, etc.
its the micro level that sucks. im afraid that my dialogue is cringe for example, even though i got great feedback.
writing and "finishing" it legit feels im bleeding onto the paper. im far from a lazy person, in any aspect of my life, its just that this s*** is super uncomfortable and def not sth i want to do for the rest of my life
if i could direct a team and bring my ideas through in speech and planning, that would be a dream come true

I’m underqualified to advise you but I hope you figure out what’s best for you

appreciate it g

You only live once and theres always time to go to school its better to see what you can make of yourself rather than just doing what you know you can

completely agree. problem is, i dont know where to go.
i know i got stories to tell, i have a plan for telling them in a multi-media way through an app. story is crazy, been tinkering since 2007, my soul is in this. monetization scheme figured out, everything. just need to figure out how to make it happen.
im teaching myself swift rn to code for iphone and working on my story, but everything is going way too slow for me. i just turned 26 and theres so much i wanna do bruh. kanye was already making beats for jay when he was like 23.

it sounds like you need money or a creative team of people who ain't doing s***.

hit up your friends. preferably the ones on d**** with midlife crisis issues.

idk what else to tell you that you don't know.
all you're trying to do is pitch ideas and do none of the dirty work. so finish your prototype and work on your network,
work on your salespitch for the idea you have and start working on a 1,000 more.

Its best not to compare yourself to people chief keef reached a national audience at 16 and Danny Brown blew up at 30 all you can do is put in the work

it sounds like u fear completing the project because you want stuff to be perfect. pulling ideas from the abstract ("stories, scenes, character arcs, themes, motifs, etc.") to the concrete ("micro level", e.g. dialogue, demonstrating your themes, pacing where/when things will occur) is pretty much the first really significant process where you creatively encounter whether your material is as good as you want it to be or not. the abstract, bigger picture ideas will always sound more appealing than the concrete things at first because they leave more to your imagination, which simultaneously gives you less work to do but also gives you a great feeling of instant satisfaction -- not because you're genuinely satisfied w/ the creation, but because you're not dissatisfied. and the rzn you're not dissatisfied (and thereby somewhat satisfied, as you still make progress when you conceptualize bigger ideas for a work) is that you haven't obviously failed. it's hard to have abstract ideas be total failures because you can feel their potential. this is the stage where a lot of ppl, including myself somewhat currently w something i'm working on, get stuck.

when you start bringing your ideas into low-level realization with dialogue and basically all the ways that you wish to express the higher level ideas, you're confronting the actuality of your work, as well as the genuine opportunity to be dissatisfied because you're dealing with something tangible instead of something that has the excuse of being somewhat untouchable due to its abstractness. i get why you don't like this feeling, and i don't either at times, but that feeling passes over time and with practice. it can be kinda cyclically unmotivating with each new project you try to make, or with each new aspect of a project u try to realize, but it's also pretty much the only space where you can figure out whether and how your s*** will actually work out for an audience. therefore, working in this space is good not only for you/your work but for your ability to convey your ideas to a team if that remains your later-on goal. cus trust me, other people struggle just as much w making things concrete. it's a commitment of sorts (but really it isn't, espc if you're self-directing, as you can change s*** whenever you want unless you have a quickly-approaching deadline). and this commitment kinda sez something bout whoever's making it, so that leaves a lotta people, including your would-be workers, in some state of similar paralysis. yes that commitment-feeling kinda gets mitigated by the bureaucratic effort of being the details-guy for an ideas-guy, as they are "just doing their job" and may be more willing to actively produce content given that there's lower risk in it for them/their ego, but by that same quoted idea they're also less likely to branch out n expand on ideas like you perhaps would if you were fully making ur own work. in any case, no one is really gonna understand the abstractness of your higher-level ideas as well as u. you can get better at conveying such if u have good practice with concretizing your own ideas, though.

if you have good feedback on your current details, i'd suggest nothing but practicing those skills even more. i'd even suggest that suggestion if you had feedback that told u that u sucked cus it'd still make you better.

i've had similar aspirations of wanting to just be a guy who sprouts ideas and has other people water n nurture them, but something i think i have learned, and feel free to contest this idea, is that most idea-guys don't get the authority to be idea-guys until they've proven that they can realize something on the many levels of creation. or they got in thru nepotism/money. somethin like that.

man, im not exaggerating when im saying this is some of the truest s*** ive ever read.
much love to you for this. you helped me understand some s*** about myself i never really could decipher.
i completely agree with everything youre saying. i just gotta force my way through it. my ego is the main enemy here i think.
i still dont think writing is my thing, but the bigger issue is def the fear of making it critically vulnerable and tangible.
i just dont understand, because im an absolute workhorse in everything else i do. but writing this is legit some of the hardest s*** ive ever done in my life, even tho i feel like i should be loving it. could be because of the long ass buildup.
but youre right. s***, maybe thats why kanye is mumbling all his s*** lately.
do you have any additional tips on how to keep working on this? how did you deal with this personally?

youre right, its hard cause i look up to these people. i legit read through wikipedia articles to see when rappers blew up and it puts me down man. it sounds ridiculous typing this out, cause i know it doesnt matter.

youre right about the dirty work tbh. its not even cause im lazy, but just cause its uncomfortable on a deep level i cant describe. like i can carry my ass to the gym daily, work full time and go to school, but i cant write this s*** that i love so much.
but i gotta stop b****ing about it, and just force through it. thanks for checking me fam

Man I don’t have any advice but I can relate to your situation.

I wanna do something with music and singing but I’m about to be 20 and feel like that ship has sailed

one thing that helps with writing conversations. is to talk more and pick up on your dialougue and the way people around you talk. put yourself in their shoes and see what they would say.

also you can short out dialogue by adding more details to scenarios and the background scenery. letting the story carry more weight than the actual dialogue.

play to your strengths

&

practice makes perfect.

you're about to be 20 chill out if you turn to 25 and got nowhere just switch to R&B.'

i think being overall flexible but imposing deadlines on urself is helpful. as in, find someone u trust enough to say that you'll give em a draft or somethin on whatever day, and then make sure u do that. that ensures that u do actually make something and don't just float in ur head for weeks. but then after they give feedback or maybe just some impressions, you can go back n change stuff at your whim.

at that point, sometimes it's more useful to dwell on that particular thing you just created, sometimes it's more useful to shelve it for a future week and move onto the next chapter/sequence/whatev. a lotta this s*** is contextual so it's hard to give good overview guidance ykno, but i think momentum in some form is pretty key

also working out helps me a lot; sometimes u meditate on ideas there, sometimes u escape from ideas there. u say u exercise already, so that's good