lucid

5y

just f***in rambling i’m sorry

lucid

5y

man when i just finished that movie like a few hours ago, i just started feeling a ton of things all at once. bad and good. like i was exactly in that scenario. it was surreal. i don’t think anything else has done something like that to me in a while. haven’t had a meltdown since i was in sophomore year in hs, but i was real close.

what i thought about my irl situations didn’t help either.

DAVIDP

5y

whats going on irl? you having a quarter life crisis kind of? bro im sorry to hear please continue talking if you need to though espeicially if it helps. we'll do our best to talk to you

lucid

5y

this is gonna be a mouthful

my family is pretty much on its last leg rn, only thing helping me rn is my grandma on mom’s side, but i don’t really connect with her really. living with my dad’s grandma rn, since my mom is over-reliant on weed and pills, so i don’t associate with her anymore. my dad’s dying of ms and idk when it’ll be the last day, and my grandma verbally abuses me a lot (i have aspergers and bpd which she can’t comprehend, she has no internet and relies on the news on tv) but she keeps the roof over my head and gives me anything i want. dad’s grandfather is not a bad person at all, probably my favorite but age is catching up to him. my mom’s grandfather is a racist homophobe and i couldn’t tell you how many times he’s called me the n word and other racial and homophobic slurs at me. not to mention all the uncles and aunties i have that i don’t speak to.

i guess the only thing keeping me from going insane is my siblings. always got someone to talk to, a great thing ofc. i got laid off of my library job like 3 weeks ago which hurt me a lot but i’m doing some accounting work. was the best option for me.

also have 3 root canals and have to get all 4 wisdom teeth taken out idk when, that with major trypanophobia, that will be excellent.

just tryna make it through in life at the moment. i’m broke as hell rn, so can’t do much at the moment

lucid

5y

idk how i didn’t go back to x after this, s*** is super stressful

lucid

5y

man when i just finished that movie like a few hours ago, i just started feeling a ton of things all at once. bad and good. like i was exactly in that scenario. it was surreal. i don’t think anything else has done something like that to me in a while. haven’t had a meltdown since i was in sophomore year in hs, but i was real close.

what i thought about my irl situations didn’t help either.

lucid

5y

just f***in rambling i’m sorry

lucid

5y

this is gonna be a mouthful

my family is pretty much on its last leg rn, only thing helping me rn is my grandma on mom’s side, but i don’t really connect with her really. living with my dad’s grandma rn, since my mom is over-reliant on weed and pills, so i don’t associate with her anymore. my dad’s dying of ms and idk when it’ll be the last day, and my grandma verbally abuses me a lot (i have aspergers and bpd which she can’t comprehend, she has no internet and relies on the news on tv) but she keeps the roof over my head and gives me anything i want. dad’s grandfather is not a bad person at all, probably my favorite but age is catching up to him. my mom’s grandfather is a racist homophobe and i couldn’t tell you how many times he’s called me the n word and other racial and homophobic slurs at me. not to mention all the uncles and aunties i have that i don’t speak to.

i guess the only thing keeping me from going insane is my siblings. always got someone to talk to, a great thing ofc. i got laid off of my library job like 3 weeks ago which hurt me a lot but i’m doing some accounting work. was the best option for me.

also have 3 root canals and have to get all 4 wisdom teeth taken out idk when, that with major trypanophobia, that will be excellent.

just tryna make it through in life at the moment. i’m broke as hell rn, so can’t do much at the moment

PNW

5y

@DAVIDP check PM

DAVIDP

5y

real s***

CLDP

5y

How’re you paying for your dental work?

CLDP

5y

To see a reality you’d like to avoid fictitious or not is very hard to process. I’m sorry. Did you pick this to watch purposefully?

DAVIDP

5y

yo dude im really sorry to hear, sounds like a lot of bullshit you have to go through. firstly do you see a therapist or anyone to talk to about this stuff? do you take antidepressants or something to for the mental stuff? i personally have antidepressants that work for me with a combo of therapy and its been working lately lot better.

you are lucky to have people to talk to as well bro family is extremely important and your a VERY selfless guy which is awesome, its nice to see you put other people before you. alot of people dont have this trait anymore in our society. and i really fw you because of that its awesome to see.

as for your racist grandma im sorry, its depressing asf to have family members who are like that (personally cant relate to that) but i cant imagine her calling you the n word and s*** thats so f***ed up. have you ever tried to explain it to her simply? sometimes when people who are very ignorant say stuff its best to just explain things in simple terms to them.

also, your gonna go places, you're a really bright guy. your in an accounting job and your starting to make ends meet? those jobs are well paying. do you plan to go to school or learn a trade?

anyways sorry to hear about all this stuff bro. its nice that your being open we're here to talk

VALERIE1

5y

keep my thread on lockdown for me