was in an 8 month relationship until about three weeks ago when i was broken up with over the phone outta nowhere. it was the longest relationship i've had. she's in her last year of uni and i'm in my first year of law school. she didn't really give me any explanation other than "i'm going through a hard time and need to work on myself." she mentioned before that she wasn't doing great, and i tried to talk to her about things but she just refused. when she came home for thanksgiving she refused to speak with me in person. she said she wanted to wait until december break so she could have a "more rational" conversation. (i have mutual friends with her at her university who would have told me so i know she wasn't cheating pls don't say that itt).

it's just all so weird. when i was with her i felt really in control of my life. now i feel like i don't even have control over myself. she wasn't perfect for me by any means, but she was my biggest supporter.

on one end i feel really sad that this is all over. like i want to get back with her because it was a great relationship. but on the other hand i'm just so angry at her and feel like i would be a pushover if i got back with someone who just walked out on me like that. maybe that anger is just coming from my ego. and maybe that sadness is just coming from the total lack of closure that i have.

what's worse is that it's made me pretty depressed recently and i have finals coming up. it's been almost impossible for me to study because i just can't stop thinking about where i went wrong. i can't stop thinking about whether i'll find someone who will support me the same way that she did. i feel like i didn't appreciate the relationship enough. i didn't tell her i loved her enough. but i also feel like she's a horrible person for just walking out with no warning and no conversation about things beforehand.

there probably isn't anything anyone can say to make me feel better about things. s*** i doubt anyone even reads this in full. i just needed to vent. idk.

Bro with all due love and respect, it’s HER LOSS.

You sound like a great and highly educated person who will be able to rebound especially with that potential career of yours.

Just let this be motivation for you to be even better than when you were with her, so one day she looks up and knows she f***ed up by dumping someone that was going somewhere.

You got this King!

I’m sorry op

Honestly the whole not talking about it thing is a red flag to me, it’s obviously not just her going through a hard time. That’s just an excuse. Something happened or changed for her to want to end it, that whole thing is BS

I know you said don’t say cheating so I’m not saying that but her interest has probably moved elsewhere

My advice would be don’t beat yourself up, it doesn’t sound like you did anything particularly wrong. She probably is a bad person to treat you like that and I know it’s hard, but you shouldn’t think about getting back with her. Let her go

Crine do you think she is that all great because she supported whatever dumb s*** your doing? She only do it because you wasnt accessible to her. Now you’re accessible to her that’s what she will do.

It’s always good to vent and get out your thoughts

Hope you feel better

say no more:

I love you @op

Cry that s*** out for a minute, dust yourself off and pick your head up

She sounds like a very weird girl who probably had some traumas and was never as invested as you were, unfortunately
When a person is in a relationship with someone they like, they will want to talk to them about their problems. Breaking up over phone after 8 months and saying something like “uh I need more time to be able to discuss it rationally 🤓” is not normal.

Still man that’s really rough and I hope you feel better. You’re gonna have to find a way to put a bandaid on it for finals, though. Best of luck.

Never base your happiness on another person. A relationship is supposed to be two people sharing happiness with each other. Sharing experiences and growing together.

You should still be able to do all of that stuff without them if it came to that. Learning experience for you

Focus up on your finals and lock in. It was an 8 month relationship. Don’t let it f*** up your future.

she’s definitely seeing someone else bro i’m sorry

thank u brother

thanks to you guys for being supportive. always means a bunch to me and the perspective you're all giving me is super helpful. much love.