9 years since my dad passed today 😔

I feel so bad

I've fantasized about jumping off a parking garage down town for years I'll play scenarios in my head of me going to the top and what it might be like when my feet leave the edge.

I'm too f***ing p**** though. Might start doing heroin or something for a easy way out

My dumbass got a tattoo to stop doing coke. Lasted about a month. Do it occasionally again even though I'm broke and quit my job on an impulse decision last week with no back up but because I don't wanna be on this planet

I'm a idiot stuck in my ways

LIKE F*** I DON'T RECALL SIGNING UP FOR THIS LIFE S*** I WISH THE BIG BANG NEVER HAPPENED

what's its called when you think everyone hates you?

Don’t know the name but it’s a form of anxiety

22 years and nothing to show for it
big stuck
big anxious
big demotivated
the cycle continues

I have such a dope life and I cannot shake the depression or desire to just spontaneously combust and die

There is one truth I am absolute on. There is no god. There's nothing looking out for the truly unwell people out here. Its so cold outside and they don't even deserve the luxury of sanity. Armageddon is the only possible way out of this system

I’m just not feelin it today

depressed af and trying not to cry while at work

Go to your car and cry fam

new music don’t even hit no more

What kind of music you into?

R&B
It feels good for the first cpl listens but after it’s like whatever

honeymoon phase is too real and it affects me in every part of life

I think that’s just a common r&b feel, I feel the same way about it

I myself have been listening to a lot of soul because even after the millionth time listening to it, the passion in the persons voice never fades

this is going to sound very bitter but i hate when niggas say “just go out there and meet people / girls” when you say youre lonely

this s*** isnt a f***ing movie dog

random people dont just approach you normally. yes you have to get up and make friends yourself but it aint easy when youre anxiety makes it damn near impossible to talk to anyone

i Feel this but once u break out ur shell and quit thinking about it it gets easier to approach ppl. Feels really f***ing good when u finally take that step: It helps working a job that involves customer service n social engineering too.

No it doesnt lmao breaking out of my shell only makes it worse cause all of humanity f***ing hates me for whatever reason

And having a pity party about it helps how? Why don’t U try some self improvement, unrelated to socializing

Because that doesnt do s*** lmao

“Go for a walk” Great im still depressed but now im walking while depressed

U sound like an loser bro, get out that mindset and have a positive f***ing attitude doing one thing in ur life. You be surprised how easy it is to make a habit of that, and how much less effort it is then to be reveling in your misery forever.