i dont even remember Spicey Spermwhale bruh
e t 👽·2 replies
Water GiverB nice
If that wasn't nice, you haven't seen mean.
·1 replye tIf that wasn't nice, you haven't seen mean.
i keep tryna tell him this
- e t 👽·2 replies
CutiePieHoleHoly crap did you update the ai
He's the thread's Tinashe defender. Tinashe is his most-used word, ahead of "album" and "music." His positions: "Tinashe is so beautiful and needs to be protected from demons." "Its actually f***ed that drake hasnt promoted Tinashe." "Can we get tinashe over outkast on ktt2 top trending artist?" He also resents Ariana's TikTok dominance ("Where are all the Tinashe tiktoks"), and Camille counts him among the thread's "madge men," its Madonna loyalists.
His one declared obsession is Pokémon. He admits he's hopeless about it, and his posts back him up: Giratina episodes that scared him as a kid, the Nintendo x IKEA Animal Crossing collab ("pretty cool actually"), and complaints about $80 Mario Kart. He's also back on anime and playing new PS5 releases.
He's a deadpan absurdist, and his typos are part of it. John Mauve once asked whether the typos are a bit. His best self-description: "I be typing
/ But my face be like 😐." He'll announce he's been inactive because he hit someone with his car, having mentioned several times that he sold it years ago. Or: "I feel like i was jim morrison in my past life and i dont want to talk about it because i dont want people to think im joking." His stated age moves between 26, 42, and 43 depending on the day.Underneath, he's content. He's moved to New York and lives the small-apartment life: no car ("i live in a city where driving makes no sense"), air-fried salmon, a mop he's afraid to use because there's no drain, and a possible roach during movie night. He's proud of his premature grays ("My patches of grey are proof i work hard"). His single best line is basically a thesis: "Sometimes u think to urself like wow im 26 typing on a dead kanye forum... eating popcorn and air fried salmon. Then ur like actually, i can kinda vibe with this?😊"
Kodak is still his person, but he's widened out. In the old data, 41% of everything he @mentioned was Kodak. This year it's 24%. Kodak is still his top partner both ways, but frenchpress, Camille, HNDRXX, and JACKIE ARTIST are now close behind. He also ran the thread's Stankie saga. He publicly defended Stankie when he got banned ("why are we banning users for stupid jokes when the site already dying"). Then came a falling-out and a public olive branch ("@Stankie can we make things right? Its not sitting with my spirit well that you are an opp"), followed by a reconciliation and, apparently, the Ye show in Phoenix. He still logs Stankie's "digital assaults" on him for the record.
He likes to rally the room. His most-replied post this year is "Anyone want to push some pages?" with 101 replies. Another: "do you guys f*** w me?" He also weighed in on the election: "kdoggy is the best op bet for stability. But chaos, its obviously kodak spice."
In short: CutiePieHole is a cheerful, typo-proud New Yorker who takes Tinashe, Pokémon, and his friendships seriously, and very little else.
UncMC 🪕e t@BiasToTruth
He's the phantom. He showed up with a backstory already loaded: "Just know / That person is dead now / I've changed." Camille's immediate reply was "@Vibe?" He's also posted "I've always been here, I am a phantom" and "Kodak not the same person he was when I was first itt." So he's clearly a veteran under a new name, and he's never said who. Nothing in the older data shows up under either of his names, so his past self is still an open case.
He's the career-advice guy. When Nort asked what he does, he answered ("I work at a financial firm, client relationship associate") and then gave a full TED talk on call centers: "Call centers got me where I am today. Slept on career path." After that came a whole series explaining how much of daily life is secretly call centers ("When you lose your debit card and need a replacement and call the bank, that's call center"). He's also the guy who'll tell you to actually apply for the benefits you're owed, because "these benefits exist for a reason."
He's his mom's biggest fan. "My mom and I are so tight," and "She worked hard and raised two boys. She did her best and we both turned out alright." His best line about her is a roast of himself: "Think the worse thing my mom did was convince me I am intelligent... she laid it on a little too thick. Went to my head." ET's reply: "Only someone intelligent would make a statement like this." They also argue about movies. She hated Sinners because of "the evil voodoo," and he's still processing it.
He's the unc of the thread, literally. His big brother handed him a CD book in fourth grade and The College Dropout was in it, which puts him around 30. He's protective of the hip-hop he grew up on ("Ken Carson is so disconnected from the hip-hop I grew up on, may as well be another genre") and says it's what he knows best, because "that's the culture I grew up in." He grew up in Aurora, Colorado, and now lives somewhere in the Virginia–Carolinas area. When ET couldn't believe the Aurora part, he added that the famous theater was his local one.
His humor is dry, fast, and a little cold on purpose. When ET mixed him up with Classique: "Yeah all black people post alike huh." On someone's link: "Bro posted his garbage itt. That's what he thinks this thread is worth." He has a recurring bit about demanding a suitor bring him 100 foreskins for his daughter's hand. And his most-argued-about take: "Sparkling water>>."
His circle: Kodak is who he replies to most, Tuneout replies to him most, and Camille, rvi, CutiePieHole, and Bruises round out his regulars.
In short: UncMC is the steady older head who'll give you real career advice, defend old-school hip-hop, clown you in six words, and never tell you who he used to be.
That’s kinda weird
I appreciate it- ·1 replye t
If that wasn't nice, you haven't seen mean.
Did u just send me a threat 😡💢
·1 replye tHe's the thread's Tinashe defender. Tinashe is his most-used word, ahead of "album" and "music." His positions: "Tinashe is so beautiful and needs to be protected from demons." "Its actually f***ed that drake hasnt promoted Tinashe." "Can we get tinashe over outkast on ktt2 top trending artist?" He also resents Ariana's TikTok dominance ("Where are all the Tinashe tiktoks"), and Camille counts him among the thread's "madge men," its Madonna loyalists.
His one declared obsession is Pokémon. He admits he's hopeless about it, and his posts back him up: Giratina episodes that scared him as a kid, the Nintendo x IKEA Animal Crossing collab ("pretty cool actually"), and complaints about $80 Mario Kart. He's also back on anime and playing new PS5 releases.
He's a deadpan absurdist, and his typos are part of it. John Mauve once asked whether the typos are a bit. His best self-description: "I be typing
/ But my face be like 😐." He'll announce he's been inactive because he hit someone with his car, having mentioned several times that he sold it years ago. Or: "I feel like i was jim morrison in my past life and i dont want to talk about it because i dont want people to think im joking." His stated age moves between 26, 42, and 43 depending on the day.Underneath, he's content. He's moved to New York and lives the small-apartment life: no car ("i live in a city where driving makes no sense"), air-fried salmon, a mop he's afraid to use because there's no drain, and a possible roach during movie night. He's proud of his premature grays ("My patches of grey are proof i work hard"). His single best line is basically a thesis: "Sometimes u think to urself like wow im 26 typing on a dead kanye forum... eating popcorn and air fried salmon. Then ur like actually, i can kinda vibe with this?😊"
Kodak is still his person, but he's widened out. In the old data, 41% of everything he @-mentioned was Kodak. This year it's 24%. Kodak is still his top partner both ways, but frenchpress, Camille, HNDRXX, and JACKIE ARTIST are now close behind. He also ran the thread's Stankie saga. He publicly defended Stankie when he got banned ("why are we banning users for stupid jokes when the site already dying"). Then came a falling-out and a public olive branch ("@Stankie can we make things right? Its not sitting with my spirit well that you are an opp"), followed by a reconciliation and, apparently, the Ye show in Phoenix. He still logs Stankie's "digital assaults" on him for the record.
He likes to rally the room. His most-replied post this year is "Anyone want to push some pages?" with 101 replies. Another: "do you guys f*** w me?" He also weighed in on the election: "kdoggy is the best op bet for stability. But chaos, its obviously kodak spice."
In short: CutiePieHole is a cheerful, typo-proud New Yorker who takes Tinashe, Pokémon, and his friendships seriously, and very little else.
Do one for me
- e t 👽·1 replyWater Giver
Did u just send me a threat 😡💢
lmao nah, but i can make the AI roast the s*** out of him
- Kodak Spice
i keep tryna tell him this
B nice
- e t
lmao nah, but i can make the AI roast the s*** out of him
The machine is tunable
I have some names I will slide by soon enough, don't ask why I'm sliding, just feed it to the machine - and crank it
All Hands on D*ck!
- e t 👽·4 repliesWESLEYS THEORY
Do one for me
He saw the drift coming. In November he wrote: "I just think the overall taste of this thread and what truly interests it are moving away from what interests me or my taste IRL. And that's ok." It was said without drama, and he meant it.
The winter got loud. There was a November fight over a racial reference, then a January blowup with JACKIE ARTIST that people still call "the Artist Wesley fiasco." On February 17 he posted, in a row: "Hate this goddamn thread." "Why do I even waste my time here." "I'm self muting." Then he went quiet. The thread felt it. ET's read: "Bruises left because Wesley and Art left. It's hard to lose two arch nemesis in one week and keep going." fuego: "bring back artie bruises and wesley and herbthot."
Then the album came out. On April 9 he returned with: "I'm back…for the sake of my album." That night he hosted a live listening session: "ALBUM PRODUCED ENTIRELY BY WESLEY / S/O NORT and CAMILLE FOR THEIR CONTRIBUTIONS / 3 YEARS IN THE MAKING / FIFTEEN TRACKS." The thread showed up. HNDRXX tagged everyone, Nort got out "the Good Headphones," and Camille reported the album "INGESTING." ET shared the description Wesley sent him: "A combination of toxic masculinity and acceptance of truth which is inevitably heartbreaking." Afterward: "I knew I had to come back one more time to planner thread and deliver what I'd promised for years. Thank you for everything. ✌️" That became his most-liked post of the year.
To be accurate about it: it was a live premiere, not a public release. By May Camille was posting "there is no wesley album." HNDRXX asked, fairly, how you build a fanbase without putting music out. In June Wesley said the album cover had just come back. So it's finished and premiered, but it isn't on streaming services yet.
Life offline is going well. In January: "Im going on a date this Saturday with the first girl I've felt a real spark with since my longterm ex. I'm genuinely happy rn." In February: "Things are lining up. I've lost 10-11 pounds since new years... Album fully recorded." By summer he had a girlfriend ("imma go over and see my girlfriend"), and this week he mentioned taking her to see Primetime.
He's still Wesley about music. On Drake: "He's washed." He counts "over half this thread" as Drake stans, which to him proves the point.
He's still around, just lightly. "I still come on here once or twice a day and see what's going on." His circle this year was bmass, Bruises, HNDRXX, Camille, and Sizzy. His latest post reads like a thesis: "I used to hate on s*** / Now if I really hate it, I just will it out of existence / You'll never hear a peep outta me anymore about something I hate."
In short: the thread's most dramatic retiree finally kept a promise from 2023, found someone, and learned to log off. He still checks in.
EchiCat 🐱e tNever saw recent praise for the fall off any any social media site, ngl. Maybe when it first came out, nobody has talked about it since
came and went
- e t
He saw the drift coming. In November he wrote: "I just think the overall taste of this thread and what truly interests it are moving away from what interests me or my taste IRL. And that's ok." It was said without drama, and he meant it.
The winter got loud. There was a November fight over a racial reference, then a January blowup with JACKIE ARTIST that people still call "the Artist Wesley fiasco." On February 17 he posted, in a row: "Hate this goddamn thread." "Why do I even waste my time here." "I'm self muting." Then he went quiet. The thread felt it. ET's read: "Bruises left because Wesley and Art left. It's hard to lose two arch nemesis in one week and keep going." fuego: "bring back artie bruises and wesley and herbthot."
Then the album came out. On April 9 he returned with: "I'm back…for the sake of my album." That night he hosted a live listening session: "ALBUM PRODUCED ENTIRELY BY WESLEY / S/O NORT and CAMILLE FOR THEIR CONTRIBUTIONS / 3 YEARS IN THE MAKING / FIFTEEN TRACKS." The thread showed up. HNDRXX tagged everyone, Nort got out "the Good Headphones," and Camille reported the album "INGESTING." ET shared the description Wesley sent him: "A combination of toxic masculinity and acceptance of truth which is inevitably heartbreaking." Afterward: "I knew I had to come back one more time to planner thread and deliver what I'd promised for years. Thank you for everything. ✌️" That became his most-liked post of the year.
To be accurate about it: it was a live premiere, not a public release. By May Camille was posting "there is no wesley album." HNDRXX asked, fairly, how you build a fanbase without putting music out. In June Wesley said the album cover had just come back. So it's finished and premiered, but it isn't on streaming services yet.
Life offline is going well. In January: "Im going on a date this Saturday with the first girl I've felt a real spark with since my longterm ex. I'm genuinely happy rn." In February: "Things are lining up. I've lost 10-11 pounds since new years... Album fully recorded." By summer he had a girlfriend ("imma go over and see my girlfriend"), and this week he mentioned taking her to see Primetime.
He's still Wesley about music. On Drake: "He's washed." He counts "over half this thread" as Drake stans, which to him proves the point.
He's still around, just lightly. "I still come on here once or twice a day and see what's going on." His circle this year was bmass, Bruises, HNDRXX, Camille, and Sizzy. His latest post reads like a thesis: "I used to hate on s*** / Now if I really hate it, I just will it out of existence / You'll never hear a peep outta me anymore about something I hate."
In short: the thread's most dramatic retiree finally kept a promise from 2023, found someone, and learned to log off. He still checks in.
do one for herbthot! omfg
- ·1 reply
Whole night ruined because i seen someone crying over their dogs dead body on tiktok! WHAT THE F***! Not cool
ace until proven hetero is so real tho @rvi @Extraterrestrial
- CutiePieHole
Whole night ruined because i seen someone crying over their dogs dead body on tiktok! WHAT THE F***! Not cool
hey bae ai sayin u dont luv me no more
- UncMC 🪕
20 years from now
- e t
He saw the drift coming. In November he wrote: "I just think the overall taste of this thread and what truly interests it are moving away from what interests me or my taste IRL. And that's ok." It was said without drama, and he meant it.
The winter got loud. There was a November fight over a racial reference, then a January blowup with JACKIE ARTIST that people still call "the Artist Wesley fiasco." On February 17 he posted, in a row: "Hate this goddamn thread." "Why do I even waste my time here." "I'm self muting." Then he went quiet. The thread felt it. ET's read: "Bruises left because Wesley and Art left. It's hard to lose two arch nemesis in one week and keep going." fuego: "bring back artie bruises and wesley and herbthot."
Then the album came out. On April 9 he returned with: "I'm back…for the sake of my album." That night he hosted a live listening session: "ALBUM PRODUCED ENTIRELY BY WESLEY / S/O NORT and CAMILLE FOR THEIR CONTRIBUTIONS / 3 YEARS IN THE MAKING / FIFTEEN TRACKS." The thread showed up. HNDRXX tagged everyone, Nort got out "the Good Headphones," and Camille reported the album "INGESTING." ET shared the description Wesley sent him: "A combination of toxic masculinity and acceptance of truth which is inevitably heartbreaking." Afterward: "I knew I had to come back one more time to planner thread and deliver what I'd promised for years. Thank you for everything. ✌️" That became his most-liked post of the year.
To be accurate about it: it was a live premiere, not a public release. By May Camille was posting "there is no wesley album." HNDRXX asked, fairly, how you build a fanbase without putting music out. In June Wesley said the album cover had just come back. So it's finished and premiered, but it isn't on streaming services yet.
Life offline is going well. In January: "Im going on a date this Saturday with the first girl I've felt a real spark with since my longterm ex. I'm genuinely happy rn." In February: "Things are lining up. I've lost 10-11 pounds since new years... Album fully recorded." By summer he had a girlfriend ("imma go over and see my girlfriend"), and this week he mentioned taking her to see Primetime.
He's still Wesley about music. On Drake: "He's washed." He counts "over half this thread" as Drake stans, which to him proves the point.
He's still around, just lightly. "I still come on here once or twice a day and see what's going on." His circle this year was bmass, Bruises, HNDRXX, Camille, and Sizzy. His latest post reads like a thesis: "I used to hate on s*** / Now if I really hate it, I just will it out of existence / You'll never hear a peep outta me anymore about something I hate."
In short: the thread's most dramatic retiree finally kept a promise from 2023, found someone, and learned to log off. He still checks in.
Nice summary
- e t
He saw the drift coming. In November he wrote: "I just think the overall taste of this thread and what truly interests it are moving away from what interests me or my taste IRL. And that's ok." It was said without drama, and he meant it.
The winter got loud. There was a November fight over a racial reference, then a January blowup with JACKIE ARTIST that people still call "the Artist Wesley fiasco." On February 17 he posted, in a row: "Hate this goddamn thread." "Why do I even waste my time here." "I'm self muting." Then he went quiet. The thread felt it. ET's read: "Bruises left because Wesley and Art left. It's hard to lose two arch nemesis in one week and keep going." fuego: "bring back artie bruises and wesley and herbthot."
Then the album came out. On April 9 he returned with: "I'm back…for the sake of my album." That night he hosted a live listening session: "ALBUM PRODUCED ENTIRELY BY WESLEY / S/O NORT and CAMILLE FOR THEIR CONTRIBUTIONS / 3 YEARS IN THE MAKING / FIFTEEN TRACKS." The thread showed up. HNDRXX tagged everyone, Nort got out "the Good Headphones," and Camille reported the album "INGESTING." ET shared the description Wesley sent him: "A combination of toxic masculinity and acceptance of truth which is inevitably heartbreaking." Afterward: "I knew I had to come back one more time to planner thread and deliver what I'd promised for years. Thank you for everything. ✌️" That became his most-liked post of the year.
To be accurate about it: it was a live premiere, not a public release. By May Camille was posting "there is no wesley album." HNDRXX asked, fairly, how you build a fanbase without putting music out. In June Wesley said the album cover had just come back. So it's finished and premiered, but it isn't on streaming services yet.
Life offline is going well. In January: "Im going on a date this Saturday with the first girl I've felt a real spark with since my longterm ex. I'm genuinely happy rn." In February: "Things are lining up. I've lost 10-11 pounds since new years... Album fully recorded." By summer he had a girlfriend ("imma go over and see my girlfriend"), and this week he mentioned taking her to see Primetime.
He's still Wesley about music. On Drake: "He's washed." He counts "over half this thread" as Drake stans, which to him proves the point.
He's still around, just lightly. "I still come on here once or twice a day and see what's going on." His circle this year was bmass, Bruises, HNDRXX, Camille, and Sizzy. His latest post reads like a thesis: "I used to hate on s*** / Now if I really hate it, I just will it out of existence / You'll never hear a peep outta me anymore about something I hate."
In short: the thread's most dramatic retiree finally kept a promise from 2023, found someone, and learned to log off. He still checks in.
This legit had a hero's journey arc to it wtf
Also the bot low-key randomly dissed the n exposed the whole thread before getting back on track
- e t 👽·1 reply
I asked it roast me
He's had ten display names this year, including "Poopfeast420," "REPLACED BY AI," "Stop AI Hate," "i love ez bread," and "bmass superfan." The most influential poster in thread history, and his branding strategy is a toddler with a label maker.
"Actually" is his personality. He managed 167 "actually"/"technically"-style corrections in one year, including informing the thread that a mozzarella stick is "technically" a cheese stick. Bruises saw it coming: "Look everyone et is having another 'well actually' moment." Nort went further: "et is literally just larry david."
He argues with Camille more than most people talk to their spouses: 2,652 replies in a year. Camille's review: "et is always angry / he's old and tired." Also: "et has yelled at his wife because he lost his socks." No denial on file.
He announced "I'm going to make an alt bot now that gives 10 likes to all of my posts." He averages 0.78 likes a post. The bot isn't working.
He talks like a Supreme Court justice and reasons like a fourth-grader. "My court room defense would have been 'well if your friends told you to jump off a bridge, would you?' Case closed." Nobody told him that's the prosecution's line.
His childhood peak: "I was both bus monitor and hallway monitor... Real dragon energy." It shows. He's still telling people to sit down and go back to class, just on a Kanye forum at 8pm.
He "skips cutscenes," "never actually watched a game story," and says of cigars, "when I'm actually smoking one I just want it to end." That's a man describing his own posts.
He compared Kodak's thread stats to Charlie Kirk: "They seen Kodak on top of every thread metric and trying to take him out. This is Charlie Kirk all over again. I'm sick to my stomach rn." That got 9 likes, more than most of his serious posts.
"You can't say this when I think Donda is mid." He built a whole case on a take everyone in the room already disagrees with.
He started learning Spanish, changed his name to "estudiante espanol," and HNDRXX declared him "washed ever since he started learning spanish." Still no fluency. The account still reads "Rauw alejandro fan."
The thread's working theory about his job, per Bruises: "I think et is a fake doctor probably. He's probably like a chiropractor."
And the eternal one: this man catfished Purrp as his ex for five months, then turned around and spent a year lecturing everyone else on reading comprehension.
Verdict: ET is Larry David with a premium badge, a court case built on a middle-school comeback, and a like-bot that never showed up for work.
·1 reply20
99,980 left
- e t 👽·2 repliessab language 3
20
99,980 left
We need that guy who had 20 kendrick lamar accounts on ktt1 to come and quote this
rvi 🌵In short: CutiePieHole is a cheerful, typo-proud New Yorker who takes Tinashe, Pokémon, and his friendships seriously, and very little else.
