Forgive and forgot

Forgive but dont forget

Which do you align with?

Been hearing this a lot lately and I just dont get forgiveness. Im not talking petty stuff either, like small arguments and miscommunication. How do you forgive someone who has done you bad for most your life? What does it mean to forgive yourself?

Forgiveness

Watching them suffer >>>>

The ability to forgive comes with awareness and self-resiliency. Maybe some acceptance too.

Thats lowkey me tho forgiveness is wack i want people to get their just desserts

What if I have those things and still choose revenger?

With a clear mind and conscious I believe that those who do frequent, non accidental harm deserve harm in return

what if the person is thriving, and maybe even doing better than you are?

Well, in that case you're making your own decisions, which is exactly what makes life so great—the ability to think and choose for yourself.

That's cool, you just simply possess a different perspective than I do; one is not better than the other. I would love to explain mine though if you're interested.

In the end, you have to "want" to forgive, and if that desire is absent from your self, then that's just the way it is.

Say what you want itt people who can find a way to forgive those who did wrong to them are always in a much better mood than people who hold onto the hurt and become miserable vengeful spirits.

Yea man id love to hear your thoughts

you’re not perfect but you’re not your mistakes

Do you think seeking justice for harm done against you and turning the other cheek are mutually exclusive?

Never forget.

“Forgive, but never forget” doesn’t make sense to me. Then you’re not really forgiving. Forgiving means to move on without a thought left in your mind. I had a very interesting discussion with my philosophy prof one day and he said something very similar, just worded it a lot better. Wish I could remember.

I think those are opposite reactions, are they not?

Lotta spite itt

Forgiveness is no negative emotion towards the situation anymore

This

Question though, who and what did you learn about in philosophy

if someone has done you bad they have it coming for them too(see karma and newtons third law), you dont need to waste your time plotting against them

Sweet, I'll try and be brief as I know this is a forum and long responses can drag.

This is how I would describe forgiveness for me.

True forgiveness has been detailed extensively in this thread already, but my addition would be exactly how to "apply" forgiveness. Knowledge without application is pointless.

Application of forgiveness starts with a full awareness of the situation; that includes understanding why the person did what they did and accepting that reason, no matter what it may be. Acceptance is a whole other thing, so I won't touch on that (unless needed).

I call this application "giving them grace," irrespective of religious connotation. This is simply (1) seeing the occurance, (2) understanding why it happened, and (3) acceptance of whatever has occurred. The key is in the control of your emotion during the ordeal, which involves relying and trusting yourself to do it in the first place.

Sorry for the lengthy post.

Dude put a trigger warning on that 😡

Thank you for the reply. True acceptance and forgiveness is a superhuman task imo. I believe there are things beyond forgiveness, but acceptance is attainable.

Do you believe someone can accept what happened to them but refuse forgiveness?

I remember learning about I think plato or socrates in philosophy, and their attitudes towards doing harm

They believed that no matter the severity of the harm done, the receiver is morally wrong to seek vengeance.

I just dont see that man. Perhaps in terms of keeping your hands clean it makes you morally good, but what good is that if you are hurt or dead? If someone you know is hurt or dead?

Great question. I personally would have to agree that you can have acceptance without forgiveness, as acceptance is more of a mentality—a cognitive system of operation—whereas forgiveness, which could also be argued to be a mentality, is deeply rooted in emotion and is interwoven with them immensely.

I would say "forgiveness" could be synonymous with the phrase "emotional acceptance" perhaps.