Been seeing this girl for 9 months and i like her, i even think i love her. But shes very attached and it can be draining. Shes great, shes loving, supportive, cooks and cleans etc. The only thing is when im with her we tend to over indulge in whatever...whether its s***weed food or just whatever. She enables all my worst behaviours and often times i need “time off” from her to feel like myself again. The closeness of quarantine the past year obv accelerated the relationship and the closeness and vulnerability all of that etc.

Idk now that summers here i cant help but feel like i need some time alone to really get back to myself again away from her. I can feel her presence starting to irritate me. And as shallow as this may seem shes gaining a lil bit of weight, i can chalk it up to her just working out more cause the ass is getting fatter but i think her obsession in getting a fatter ass is making her ignore the weight gain in her face etc. Idk what to do. Im going home for two week for my lil sisters graduation and ngl idk if i can be faithful.
What should i do? Im 22 and shes 23 btw. Also let me not get into how she does all this talking about marriage and etc

Sound like u kno what to do

idk if i can be faithful

what should i do

do you really need help figuring it out

Have you tried talking to her about it?

so leave

this too ^^^

If you’re concerned about a woman in her 20s talking about marriage I got bad news for you OP

like really is she supposed to read your mind, you can take some days to yourself if you talk to her about it

I have we talked over text yesterday cause she could obv tell a nigga was off with her being around so much and im like i just dont feel like talking at times like it just it what it is...turned into an arguement and im like i just need some alone time

Careful with this mentality

When I was younger I felt the same

Now I realize I just lost some good girls

You want them attached to you man

If you respect this person at all you need to sit down with them in person and talk about it. Treating people like quarantine pets people are taking back to the dog pound is f***ed.

If you feel like this not even a year in imagine yourself 3 years, 5 years, 10 years etc. I say just break it off cuz you don't seem to think she the one and you don't seem to be wanting a relationship and tbh a long relationship at 22 don't make much sense anyways. Just keep in mind the girls who are truly going to be down for you come few and far between so you'll have to find another one day.

If you want more space you gotta lead the relationship in that direction

Don’t wanna hang out? DONT hang out

Dont wanna talk on the phone or text? Ignore her

If she gets upset oh well, these are your standards. If she don’t like it tell her she’s free to go

But do what you have to do for you, don’t mean you gotta lose a good girl.

If your girl not obsessed with you she not the one bro

I’m not saying this one is the one but trust me I can work with a girl who’s too attached with me and help her focus on her own goals too. When they finally understand you’re not going anywhere then they feel safe enough to work on themselves and you guys glow up together, it’s honestly such a genuine dynamic. Real relationships are amazing.

I’ve also been with girls who made me feel the distance. Either they weren’t into me as much as I thought or they had communication issues... but either way it wasn’t fun

Lowkey what im scared of because shes such a great girl its crazy because we can laugh talk and it feels good to be around but then it can too much and then im like nah who am i really i dont feel like myself lost in all this

If you want to stay and work it out you def have the ability too, not to sound sexist or anything but usually a man is leading the relationship and you got the ability to get the relationship to where you want it. If you feel like you guys just over indulge in stuff when you're together then make it a point to do productive s*** when you're together or do new things. If you just sit and let her guide what you guys do then nothing will change, if you try to do other things and she ain't down or just wants to smoke all day and eat then well you have your answer.

Damn i feel you the thing is i guess im def the one playing catch up so its one of those things where i feel like she can be a crutch to my success cause shes done school and working i still a semester left and a bunch of work i have to do in all aspects of life

Yeah it’s def a balance. You have a strong sense of independence. You both still developing but like I said, seems you need more space for yourself and honestly it’s not a bad thing. Allow yourself to do that, and see how it goes

dont let anybody guilt you for that, just do it if you feel things getting too srs/heavy with you and her

Nah youre right i think thats the thing when im with her all sense of obligation and structure kinda leaves it all feels like we just do s*** based off whims like if i was supposed to do some class work she’ll pull up and then the nights gone its like i abandon my principles and discipline when im with her. But solitude has always been the way i recharge and get back to myself. Shorty can’t understand that. She wants to be around and s***.

Yeah i think def shedding these bad behaviours and some peace for a lil bit is what i need

Ik exactly what you mean at some point you just gotta say f*** it, even tho it's spending time with her, you still spending time out of your life. At some point both people should feel comfortable being in the same house/room but not being together if that makes sense, you can't just do nothing every time you near her, you gotta take care of your business and she'll likely understand if you just explain that.

@op seems like u just wanna have a hoe summer tbh

Wont lie and say having that freedom to f*** isnt enticing but theres other factors