Every time I feel like I’m getting back on my feet I just f*** myself over again

What’s the cause of your isolation?

Been struggling with bad anxiety this week. Only way I got myself to do stuff was by using a 15minute timer and alternative between doing work I’m supposed to and taking a break (which is usually just browsing the internet). Wish I could stop being so anxious about my future. My thoughts are constantly future-oriented and I’m constantly thinking about how I’m going to miss my opportunities, not achieve my goals, etc.

Meeting with a counsellor I’ve been seeing this month tomorrow again. It’s been helpful.

Not the blacked out avatar bro

spent two hours contemplating my death, is it really worth it

real friends how many of us

When will it get better

Where are you living rn?

Do you work?

Listen, you’ve been dealt a s*** hand ngl, but that’s all the more reason to not give up.

Life is cruel, it’s a cruel world we live in and it gives no f***s about anything. Fight back against your circumstances, try your absolute hardest to find happiness, that’s how you fight back

Definitely this, going through terrible situations sets you up for heavy success even if it doesn't feel like it now

Something just eating away dont think it'll ever go away lmao

All along ghost trapped in my mind
So classic

You ever be drunk and hate whatever is wrong with y brain

popping ambien with mary magdalene

Disenchanted with reality

You wouldn’t want me crying bro haha I know you and sonny kickin it in the afterlife

I promised your family ima make everything we talk about happen love you bro

It sucks thinking on how me from a few years ago would hate what I became. I don’t have any gripes with that person, but it’s weird to think about.. I don’t think I was a bad person honestly, I think I was much more open to believing in things and people than I am now.

I became what I never wanted to be. But what past me could’ve never seen was the amount of f***ing pain I had to go through. Close friend dying, one of best friends leaving me, dad almost dying twice, socially become distant from everyone.. I couldn’t have seen it coming..

I try to maintain as much of me as I can but I just don’t give a f*** anymore. I had to grow so quickly in a year time period, it was adapt or f***in die man. Nobody there to pick me up and encourage me, it was just f***ing go time.

It’s just a mental thing, it just makes me a little sad from time to time

I would never change this outcome though

Not feeling good, I’m overly sensitive and every interaction hurts, I take everything personally and to heart and it leaves me feeling like I have some kind of rug burn on my heart, irritation from contact or exposure. Idk if I would still feel this way if I had more legitimate connection and support outside of my family which I take for granted and frankly need something outside of that but never really have had anything. I ask god to end it a lot even though I don’t believe in god I try to will myself into believing and begging to let me not feel any more because I’ve felt enough, if it weren’t for my family I would end it but it really sucks trying to live for other people while in constant agony unless drunk or high, I was always alone but after the last year it’s a different level, I don’t see anyone outside work and family

I am f***ing delusional

I really might be autistic or re tarded or something