I slept wrong the other day and i woke up with the worst thigh pain i def pulled something

Shoutout Bruce Springsteen I didn’t know how hard that mf was going against maga. He’s getting death threats that’s not even surprising cuz of MAGA

This pain is unbearable omg i think i made it worse

3 girls I’m talking to now, one’s a redhead with glasses im trying to see her tonight, this Indian girl that I want to try her butter chicken, and this goth girl who I’m trying to take to the cemetary 😏 see how that goes again

How do you pull a thigh in your sleep?

i slept on my left side with my right leg across my body i think i just remember my alarm going off and i rushed to get out of bed and i felt a sharp pain

I'm getting old fr

Thank god i kept an extra ice pack in my freezer that's keeping the pain down a notch

Deadass can barely walk man i was planning on going to the office today but ig im staying home and putting an ice pack on my ass

nah get your ass in here, we need you to pick up the slack

The Indian girl I hadn’t talked to in a month or so. I asked her if I can still try her butter chicken or something and she said late last night butter chicken is still on the table. I didn’t see it but I pulled out my best dad joke “damn is it getting cold”

This goth is blonde. I’m gonna take her to the cemetery she said she wants me to bury her alive, I said I’ll find the prettiest flower to place on top of her.

This is my game

Macking

Feeling a lot better now that l rubbed my ass with biofreeze and laid on my side with a ice pack pressed on my hip flexor. If I'm able to walk i might just drop in

Man what typa hoes you be dealing with gang #poolboyq #jitshow #yougottabekiddingme

Gonna start this hashtag gimmick #yeahisaidit

Wasnt she the b**** that was hinting at wanting to peg you

A man with a micropenis has no choice but to excel at life or commit suicide.

Vote for vermin supreme!

Everyone gets a free pony!

Feel free to drop by Mr. CEO

excuse me? No one was ever going to peg me

Anyways, the last goth is gone. The new one is in.

I’ll make the decision tonight then, damn

Oh I thought you said “macro”

4 pools down. 7 to go.

None of my tings responding on hinge