I dated a girl for about a year and the second time she spent the night, I woke up and she was staring at me deep into my eyes and was horrified. She told me she had been looking at me for over half an hour like that cause she thought I looked peaceful when I slept but while a lil cute I was freaked the f*** out for a bit after

She crazy dawg. My girl checks my phone while i sleep. I wake up all my apps open and deep in my messages. B**** crazy.

instead of swallowing she spat it back at me

Y’all dating some weirdos

@python

it wasn’t on some psycho s***, it was more of a joke to get me dodging it like someone just threw a grenade. looking at it objectively it is a pretty good prank tbh

didnt give me head when i asked for it

like b**** how dare you refuse the beauty of my d***

i need a refund

Ate one of my beard hairs cause I dared her

i can’t think of anything out of the ordinary

Another girl I dated for about two years was a demon. She always wanted to hook up in public areas, parks, fields, trees, etc. one time she tried topping me (no action was happening before this) while the kid we were babysitting together was asleep in the same room. She also shaved my initials in her pubes. Her s***drive was on 100, which was less fun than you’d expect, constantly had to dip from functions or miss out seeing the homies for her

wild.

jesus man wtf

where are you meeting these people lmao

DAWG

My ex was a nut man she was topping me & right before I nutted she just straight up stopped and started watching tv no explanation I was dumbfounded

Never date the locals! Went to college and the problems disappeared immediately

Staring at me when I was trying to sleep

nahhhh what

probably this girl who was doing love spells on me and putting her period blood in my food without my knowledge. It's more common than you'd think. S***was amazing though. Broke up with her when i found out. The crazy thing is i see her in my dreams years later trying to come into my house but i never let her in. Cant trust spiritual hoes

You ever wake up to somebody staring into your soul? S*** freaked me the f*** out, I had that feeling deep down that I was being watched in the pre-wake up but wasn’t sure

in your FOOD!?!

and you just let her?

Este guey se tomo agua de calzón

Also one time made out with this girl after she gave me head and she still had the nut in her mouth. I was so in the moment i didnt stop so i tasted my....