I now it sucks but in a creative field sometimes you have to take that lowball and work your way up again even tho it feels like you should be past that. You’ve got a girl that’s threes for you, that’s alot more than some people can say. You’ve been on your own for 6 years. You followed your dreams and have achieved them once. You can do it again. In the meantime Restaurant jobs are usually pretty slack and hire anyone so if you find one justbsee if they’re hiring.

I believe in you man for what’s its worth

i was taking 3 , one was a anti-depressant the other was an anti-psychotic , now im just taking one for my anxiety

thank you so much ,

those kind of jobs aren't an option here ... they pay minimum wage in my country and people don't usually tip

you have a gf and your ktt pfp another girl i hope she leaves you

hes from a third world country leave him alone bully

They way you're describing this sounds like you're stuck in a loop. There are times when one has the feeling that he/she doesn't move forward, I've been there too.
Things like this are always difficult to discuss if we don't know you in person, especially over a written exchange.

The good side of it is I feel like you haven't reached Shenzhen Levels of depravity yet, you being able to clearly state your situation and actually point out problems (Like the house, your anxiety and that you're displaying to others that everythings fine, while you're not feeling like it inside) shows that you're able to reflect and that's great. There are people that are in way worse situations and are not able to do that, this speaks for yourself, you should aknowledge that, seriously. And don't be depressed because therapy didn't work, it's not for everyone, you yourself are your best therapist because you know yourself better than anyone else. Your strengths and your qualities that still need to be worked on.

Like @ROVO stated, appreciate the people and little things you have and that support you. It's those that will help you move forward. Sometimes when you think about everything negative that's coming at you at the same time it can feel quite overwhelming, try to get out of the hole step by step.
For example next thing you do when you wake up tomorrow and have time is clean your house, just do it. It will help you to get structured and you've accomplished something. Take it from there. But don't just say you'll do it, really do it. First thing in the morning. Even if it really annoys you, in the end it's better than feeling angry with yourself for procrastinating life.

The things you studied sound awesome, you have great tools available to express your creativity and tell stories to the world, (It'd liked to study this myself, but my skills lied elsewhere, used to try cutting videos when I was younger with PSE). Surely there are a lot of people that could be in need of your talents elsewhere, the world is bigger than just the area you're in right now and if only a puny driving license is holding you back, don't worry, I still haven't got one myself and I'm doing just fine (even if most of the people in my field are bound to need one, so I'll probably need to catch that up one day too lmao, just didn't need it up until now). Maybe if you're able to lift yourself you'll find the power to even be an enterpreneur and work as an independent director. Who knows, you're still young, you've got time.

There's also always the option to take some time off and move to another place for some months or another country. Do an exchange, see the world, learn a new language, there's more to see than the society which you feel pressured by and there are a lot of places in the world where you can live without much money. You could do something completely different than the things you've been working on until now, volunteer or heck, who knows even make a documentary abroad, I'm sure you could do it with your skills (Not saying this is the solution, I'm just trying to give you ideas).

Keep strong OP, don't let yourself get dragged down, no matter what anyone says, we're all valuable human beings, even if sometimes we're showing our worst sides, there's still a light inside which wants to shine.

On a sidenote (without judging):
Are you taking any medication or d**** that make you feel nauseous and are hindering you f.e. to clean up your house?

what does that have to do with anything

dont put him down like that bro...

im not putting him down?

well he seemed upset when i said dont cheat on her...
so you going straight to break up might make him nauseous or whatever

have you ever looked into ketamine infusion therapy? im kind of interested in it myself for similar reasons

worst case scenario it doesnt work and you still get to do ketamine legally

how do you know that isn't her

hes on ktt2

same reason he knows your pic isnt your girl

😹😹😹😹

dont quote me ever again or im reporting you relentlessly until your account is sent to e prison

Keep ya head up OP. You are in a better situation than most. Feel those emotions, accept that you have them and always find a way to move forward. Never stop striving. Never stop bettering yourself. You got this fam.

he dissed u 😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹

im asexual

i actually like the girl in your pic tho lol

nice knowing you pal

heres another quote you can use

no you just cant get girls 😹😹😹

thanks. the more the merrier

oh boy you did it not me