jd

5y

I would say the primary small thing that will pay dividends in the long run is this:

when ever you're in a situation where you get that frantic, jittery, anxious feel - like "oh I haven't said anything, I don't know what to say, what are the other people thinking about me rn?" - those thoughts

literally just learn to be comfortable with not saying s***. who cares?! That's just you for right now. Highkey as long as you start to mitigate those awkward internal feelings, people will sense that you're comfortable being quiet and respect it hardcore.

In all honesty when most people talk and talk and talk, and ask things like "Yo Henrik why you being so quiet?" THEY are the one's who are feeling awkward. They're extroverts who are thinking, "why is this guy not talking? Is it something I'm saying."

If you just sit there quietly with a comfortable energy and just smile and do you, people will honestly start to give you mad respect and like you.

CHARISMA IS NOT JUST TALKING A BUNCH. Charisma is energy.

So if you become comfortable with your inner feelings first and realize that nobody or no condition will ruin your wellbeing, THEN you will start to open up more and THEN you will become more willing to enter social events and settings. At that point it becomes a positive feedback loop.

Sorry that was a lot. But tell me if you got anymore questions. I AM a super introverted guy but at this point I'm very sociable and successful in social situations. I can make friends and ask girls out. The two ARE not mutually exclusive and I feel very passionately about it.

Palenigga

5y

Yo anyone else kinda feel like a extravert or at least non-introvert for like half a day and then all of a sudden get in that introvert vibe again and don't wanna talk to ppl anymore? Sometimes I'm just vibing and all of a sudden I just wanna go home and I be sick and tired of the people who just keep on talking and talking and talking.

9thWonderful

5y

"why are you so quiet?"

Palenigga

5y

Yo anyone else kinda feel like a extravert or at least non-introvert for like half a day and then all of a sudden get in that introvert vibe again and don't wanna talk to ppl anymore? Sometimes I'm just vibing and all of a sudden I just wanna go home and I be sick and tired of the people who just keep on talking and talking and talking.

Henrik Larsson

5y

No mate, don't say sorry for long posts. I literally read books about stuff like this and find it very interesting so please keep on going lol.
Aight but this is a pretty good time to talk about this for me as I'm starting a new job tomorrow, with only females. I'm the only guy and like 10+ something girls.
I hate smalltalk and s*** with people I don't know, so yeah it's hard for me to connect with new people - when I do, they always tell me "I THOUGHT U HATED ME" etc (at least females tell me that).

When I'm on break and s***, sit with them and chill out I certainly know I'll be looking on my phone and s*** just to not sit there and be quiet. It's like a shield to me, I guess you can feel the same. So it just ends up being a conversation with people who know each other from before, + me who's new, so I just don't care to conversate etc.

I want to make these coworkers my friends and stuff, have a good job relationship and not a stale one, but I'm pretty sure it will become that (stale) because of my "mood" and face expressions idk lol. U get me?

Henrik Larsson

5y

No mate, don't say sorry for long posts. I literally read books about stuff like this and find it very interesting so please keep on going lol.
Aight but this is a pretty good time to talk about this for me as I'm starting a new job tomorrow, with only females. I'm the only guy and like 10+ something girls.
I hate smalltalk and s*** with people I don't know, so yeah it's hard for me to connect with new people - when I do, they always tell me "I THOUGHT U HATED ME" etc (at least females tell me that).

When I'm on break and s***, sit with them and chill out I certainly know I'll be looking on my phone and s*** just to not sit there and be quiet. It's like a shield to me, I guess you can feel the same. So it just ends up being a conversation with people who know each other from before, + me who's new, so I just don't care to conversate etc.

I want to make these coworkers my friends and stuff, have a good job relationship and not a stale one, but I'm pretty sure it will become that (stale) because of my "mood" and face expressions idk lol. U get me?

Palenigga

5y

Yo anyone else kinda feel like a extravert or at least non-introvert for like half a day and then all of a sudden get in that introvert vibe again and don't wanna talk to ppl anymore? Sometimes I'm just vibing and all of a sudden I just wanna go home and I be sick and tired of the people who just keep on talking and talking and talking.

jd

5y

introversion is very real, but it's no excuse for shyness or social anxiety.

If you struggle with those things it's nothing to be ashamed of, but it is something you should work to overcome for sake of leading a more fulfilling life. Coming from someone who was in that position

Developing strong social skills as an introvert is highkey a super power. Projects rock solid security in, and enjoyment of, one's inner world.

AKA b****es will jump on the d*** - trust

Shammy

5y

Man tbh life is mad competitive everyone wants to feel like they better than someone else, like mayb not everyone but point is just focus on what ur good at. Don't stress becoming cooler or more sociable or w/e that is a waste of energy. Comfort in ur own skin and self awareness r ur greatest assets don't get sucked into this s***ty world of shallow ppl with vain thoughts

coze

5y

I love this. People are damn selfish. Work is mad annoying with all these people who think they're better just because they're better at being fake.

I wish I knew this earlier so I'd stop caring so much about doing or saying the right things to impress people.

FENTYShade350

5y

Introverts are just insecure. Can't change my mind. Get some confidence.

FENTYShade350

5y

Introverts are just insecure. Can't change my mind. Get some confidence.

Palenigga

5y

Yo anyone else kinda feel like a extravert or at least non-introvert for like half a day and then all of a sudden get in that introvert vibe again and don't wanna talk to ppl anymore? Sometimes I'm just vibing and all of a sudden I just wanna go home and I be sick and tired of the people who just keep on talking and talking and talking.

lilkuya

5y

Think I’m both

coze

5y

Used to think I'm an extrovert because I did love socializing with people, but now I realize I'm extremely introverted. I'm awkward.

I find some of my new coworkers annoying. They're so cliquey. They love talking s*** about people behind their backs. They love laughing about people behind their backs.

Spent this whole weekend working retail at two jobs. Newer job is is mad annoying, man. I'm gonna quit sooner than I originally anticipated because this isn't me. The pay's good, but I get bad vibes from my coworkers.

People are selfish, man. They might talk to you and be nice to you at work, but when everything's done, you don't exist to them.

It's hard for me to even just message people on Snapchat or through texting because I don't know if they're really cool with me like that or if I'm just a bore to them.

sosAMG

5y

I try not to be but sometimes I think I might be a loser cause I tell myself that I just don’t like anyone in those situations idk